Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLI

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I have just had a wonderful two days suffering a wonderful cold which has meant I have been sneezing and coping with a very runny nose. It has meant the last few days have been a little of a trial in so much feeling ill and achy while at work makes things very difficult to do. But as always I soldiered threw though I did not do as much as I would of liked to get done at work.

One good thing which has come from the discussion with store manager about another manager is that I am less worried about the other manager in question. Basically they can carry on their bad attitude and management hurting others but now it will stop hurting me as clearing the air has made me feel far more stronger and able to cope with their actions. I should of really said something earlier regardless it may of damaged a career which frankly is only means to earn money and not my life.

The fact my current job is only an end to means to make a living makes things so much easier and less stressful in my life plus means I really do not care if I have to move on with the better job. Tough what it does not mean I will do the minimum at the job as I am professional enough to always put 100% into my job.

Outside of work life is starting to settle down again even moving forward as my partner medical problems are finally being addressed by the doctors something long over due. Add to this I am starting to write and think again though slowly currently.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXL

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Today is going to be a day of much needed rest after 8 day run of shifts at work as my legs are really aching at the moment as I over did things last two days at work moving laptops around. This was in contrast to others at work who though because the store was quiet they could stand around doing nothing. Though they did talk some real bollocks about things they really do not know any thing about but think they are experts in.

One good thing that came out last 8 days I finally talked to my boss about certain issue I am having with colleague at work who frankly has been aggravating my depression because of their lack of empathy and major personality clash. Basically the colleague in question represents everything I dislike in modern British down to putting money and status before people and believe the corporations work for good of people in general.

The upshot of which I am finally back to being settled with a possible solution to the problem which could mean me moving store and gain much more experience in the other side of the business of the company I work for. But if that falls through at least the issue now has been aired with my main boss which will of cleared the air and hopefully make things easier for all.

So hopefully I will get back to being creative and writing again which are both long over due currently.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXXXVIII

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Once again life seams to have stopped throwing me curved balls regardless of the fact that we still have problems at home as per usual and at work due mainly to the fact I am in a more optimistic and settled mood over the last few days because Karma has finally balanced things at work.

Some people have just found out the hard way that if you do bad things to people, your job and trying to blame everyone else for their failings or mistakes Karma always comes back to balance the books. All I will say that some people at work have been side lined and lost a number of privileges because they abused them big time and got caught.

As always if I wait long enough those who have made my life difficult always end up falling over usually due to their own actions so what is currently happing at work is very satisfying but sadly a long overdue.

Otherwise I am half way through an eight day run of shifts which strangely does not cause me much mental anguish as it usually does because of my up beat mood but it is giving my legs some major problems with ache and pains which could cause issues on the last few days, something I am not looking forward too. Though it does not help I am merchandising a lot of work which involves a lot of physical activity.

There is now a possibility that I start to write and create again soon certainly myself writing this journal entry sort of indicates that I am returning back to a creative mood again.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXXXVII

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So far it has been unusual and mixed week so far even so the weekend is looming up again as I am working through the weekend until next Tuesday. Though this is usually a daunting prospect but due o the fact a certain person is not at work it will be a good opportunity to get things done without interference or someone constantly putting a mocker on things. It does mean by the time they come back to work a number of merchandising projects will be done and in place and at a point the big boss will like them and to a point he cannot change them.

Outside of work currently I am constantly tired currently which is starting to frustrate me slightly as I have so much I want to do outside of work but I currently not got the energy to do them. But slowly as the week goes on and certain stress points are solved, I have started to wake up again.

I am still in a quandary about where my career goes next but all I know is I need to change my current job as a need a change of work environment sooner than later!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXXXVI

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Today has been one of those rare days when things have gone right or to be more exact not been a real pain to do. There I was worried about money but it seams we will have enough to survive the rest of the year better than last year so in the background things are going forward in our lives.

Add to this we are not looking at the dark side of life in so much we are seemly always waiting for something bad to happen as frankly if it does there is little you can do about it so why worry about it.

Though some people at work negative attitudes is currently giving my depression a hard time because it is bring my mood down big time and my stress levels up. What makes this situation even worse it is all of their own doing but they blame everyone else for their problems. One of those many cases when people not taking responsibility and not understanding their actions can effect other people.

All it means I may have had a good day I have been quiet and locking myself from the world because it is easier than dealing with the world around me. It means my writing and creativity is suffering currently as I cannot focus or think at the moment!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXXXV

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So far this week has already been a mixed week of constant problems not helped by people constantly asking me silly questions. Another week when the bank account is going to be hit again at a time when we need the money to get a car through it’s MOT. Currently sadly it looks like we will not have enough to get the car through it’s MOT because of the current issues we have which will make life even more difficult for us at a time when I am just coping with the situation.

Add to this the current feeling of being detached from my life and those around me to a point all I want to do is run away and hide from the world. All this from my depression and those around me who surround me who bring me down to a level that aggravates my depression.

Something has to give soon in my life else I am at a point of just turning my back on everything and finally giving up on everything and myself!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXXXIV

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I have been quiet for the last few weeks as I have not exactly been myself and slightly under the weather because as always life, people and things conspire to stress me out hence make me feel more ill than I actually am. But at always I will survive and slowly get better.

My life as per usual slowly moves forward and even slowly getting better financially and at home life is moving forward as new plans are being made for the layout of the house. All very exciting and should change the nature and use of the house especially downstairs for the better.

Now also slowly thinking about my future and what I actually want from my life which certainly currently more than just work, sleeping and eating pus working in a store for a company which cares more about making money than actually looking after it’s customers and employees. I know one thing I like more time and inclination to write more especially to do with my Role-Playing Game projects some of which are long overdue completion.

So my future job must have far more regular shift pattern and certainly be far more fulfilling both intellectually and creatively so I do not come back from work stressed but energized and far more happier. Currently I am little at a loss in which direction and how to even find a new job but much like most of my life I will be struck by bold of inspiration when arrive my end every few while.

In the meanwhile I have to survive the current situation in my life and start to make the best of it even move forward again!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

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