Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLVIII

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Work is still in an interesting state of flux as there could be big changes ahead which for me will bring new opportunities either at work or elsewhere but it will both scare and kill off others careers of those who fear change.

I think I work with some people who are really afraid of change to a point they will find anyway to stop it or delay it as long as possible. Myself I find such people very sad as after all our lives are always full of change, though some changes are not beneficial, and something which can both challenge us and bring new opportunities which should be grasp with both hands.

But as always this is the difference between those of us who are freethinkers and dreamers and those who are happy to sleep through their lives which sadly a lot of the people I work with though there are some who certainly show more life than others.

Tonight I am in a mood to sit in front of the main computer and write/create a number of journal entries as I want to do something which is creative after today and make my mark on the day so wish me luck!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLVII

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The last few days or so have not been the best few days with my mood close to breaking point with myself being angry constantly with a world I really have little control of currently. All made worse with myself feeling ill almost constantly to a point currently I am almost just walking through my life on automatic.

All this not helped by the fact that I am being constantly told I cannot do this or that, including not get angry with those people and things around me are really making my life more difficult than it needs to be. I am expected to take it from these people and things without feeling angry regardless that anger like love is a natural emotion we all feel at one time and other.

But as always I have to continue on regardless of the fact I really do not want to currently as it is getting too much effort to do so!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLVI

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After a good week at work though slightly strained week at home, today has been one of those days when everything has conspired to ruin my day off and put me in a foul mood. I have not done half I wanted to do and in the end the only thing I have done successfully is sleep.

At the moment after today and last night I really feel like walking away from everything as currently is making feel as life and work is so pointless why should bother any more as I cannot win and always in the wrong. Add to this I am expected to go on regardless even if it is grinding me down.

So once again I end up with a day off when do nothing but be constantly feel angry which always leads to frustration as I would of liked to be allowed to actually do something including writing.

At the moment it really feels that I am not allowed to live my life or decide how I want to live it. If anything it really feels like everyone else is controlling my life even to a point they tell me off for not following their path they have decided for me!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLV

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Ahead are difficult times at work strangely due to people being ill or not doing their jobs which has adversely effected two stores and everyone who work there. I should be worried by the whole situation but strangely it does not phases me but I see it as an opportunity to move forward or even move on to better things. In the end it will be a number of other people at work who are going to find the changes problematic because it will highlight their current weaknesses.

All I can say this year in the new home is turning out to be a good year even if it looks like there are real problems ahead for us here but the way things are going and my state of mind it looks good what ever happens.

Though I am still fighting my depression which is making some days difficult for me especially inside of my head to a point I do not want to go to work or even get out of bed. But that is way of someone who suffers depression a constant fight with ourselves and the depression.

Now I have to fire off my creative side again which has been quiet over the previous few weeks which has been mute because of the issues at work and it will be effected by them over the next few weeks though I should start to get back disconnecting work from my home life again.

One thing I have learnt this week just how boring and predicable 25 to 35 men can be I am so glad I lived to the other side as life is so much more interesting now for me.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLIV

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Coming again to a long run of shifts which once again talking some toll on my body and mind as per usual but as always I will survive it though a little more jaded with life. Though a nice stable home life certainly gives me a rock to fight whatever life throws at me which is luckier than most people have nowadays even in the rich West.

But as always I have to work with people who are currently showing no respect to people and work environment abound them even after they have been told to act otherwise. All made worse by one work colleague who is totally disrespectful to customers and see them as cash cows rather than real people to sell too. I find their behaviour as totally immortal and unacceptable in a retail environment on so many levels. My personal view currently they should not of ever got the job in the first place as it shows they are totally unsuitable for a job in a retail come customer service environment all made worse they also have a managerial position too!

But as always it seams such people talk their way into jobs which they really are not suited for because they manage to pull the wool over the eyes of those who should of known better, sadly something which occurs far too often in modern businesses.

At least I am having a better time at work as I am going between two stores and both impressing my current manager and other store managers with my adaptability and versatility especially on the customer service desk. Add to this I am amazed that I am finding easy to work between two stores which sell slightly different products some of which I have no experience in selling.

As ever I have to blow my own trumpet it it seams I am doing my career and self confidence a world of good at the moment!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLIV

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It has been enjoyable and relaxing Easter Weekend with family visiting and working one day in an environment which was far less negative though it has had effect on me in so much I have been even more sleepy than usual. It felt like some weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I am enjoying the moment of peace while lasts before all hell lets lose later this week with myself going back to negative environment of my own store I work in plus general hassle of dealing with companies who frankly think it very acceptable to blatantly rob people in the name of business and making money regardless of the customer.

But as always we end up fighting not the system itself but businesses who put money before customers which has become the normal state of affairs in our modern world. Myself I am getting very annoyed with this state of affairs and with people in general who are too apathetic to stand up to the companies themselves and always fall for the empty promises they give them.

Ah, well another battle to fight next week against a things which frankly are all man made and could be avoided if people simply woke up. Again as always we will win here because we have too and someone has to start to stand up to the way things have become!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CDXLIII

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Today was good day for me and could be a prelude to change in my job within the company I work for or even thinking I should get around to changing jobs completely. All I did today was work part of the day for another store in the same town as my current store.

All in all the change of store made whole day at work a lot more pleasant end enjoyable again especially in a store full of people constantly bitching about the work and certain manager who is making their lives difficult. This atmosphere is very poisonous for everyone there though not noticed by the people involved.

Today was a nice shot to the arm as far a work was concerned though I was very tired tonight but in a good way not because I had become stressed at work. Though it has meant that I have not done a lot tonight but I am not as worried unlike previous nights after work.

So now there is a real possibility of a change for the better at work!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

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