After a particularly long and busy shifts the last few days I have been constantly tired and shell shocked. It has taken to today to get around to writing anything on my journals though it helps I have been inspired to write again over the last few days.
Other than usual feelings of dislocation caused by change of management at work I am feeling settled and optimistic about work even with Christmas on the horizon. It helps that the new management are bringing new ideas into the store at a time when such a boast is needed at work. Though some of the old guard are still trying to leave things as they were because they are frankly afraid of change.
Outside of work I have come to an halt finding Role-Players locally as I am at a lost how to proceed in the search but I have started to write some Nemenéra starting stories in perpetration when I find the Role-Player locally. It is slow going currently but at least I am trying to put few hours aside to write a day.
As for my depression it is still rumbling in the background making me feel constantly tired and fighting some particularly dark thoughts currently. I am back to thinking of dying and it’s process again at moments when I stop thinking about more positive sides of my life. Though this time it has become an annoyance and something I can stop now by focusing on the more positive sides of my life and the fact it is something I have no control over so wy worry about it.
I suspect that lot of the issues with my depression has to do with the onset of Autumn and Winter with the shorter days which tend to make me feel a bit down and sleepy most of the time. Luckily this time Christmas is not contributing to my stress this year helped by the fact I am more settled at home and work this year.
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