No one outside of my friends actually believe I can mess around with computers and software plus have the wherefore all to actually research the knowledge I need to do things. I always get the feeling from some people around me they are simply humouring me when I talk about what I do on my computers at home. I also get the same feeling when I point out what I have done in the past that is been a computer programmer even that I have degree in Physics and Astrophysics.
I suspect a lot of the feeling I get are due to my insecurity caused by my depression but I also suspect a lot of what I am encountering is due to the insecurity of the people around me as much as I found during my school days people are still intimidated by anyone who shows a modicum of intelligence, flare and imagination.
Over the years this is one thing which really has not changed in our society here in the United Kingdom as it strikes me our society as a whole seams to have issue with people who have real intelligence, flare even imagination. It has always been highlighted in our press here which takes great pleasure to knocking people who have shown such traits.
In the end for people like myself it has always been an issue as it has always caused issues with my self-confidence, self-image and caused insecurity in myself and people wonder why in the end people like myself end up angry, frustrated and disillusioned with the world around them.
Just lucky now I am doing something about my depression as I may still get fed up of the situation every few while but now I can fight my feelings of insecurity and remember it is not my own insecurity causing my issues but those around me who are simply afraid of anything and anyone different.
In the end it is a sad reflection of the world we have created for ourselves!
Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.
Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.
Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.