What I about to say will most probably sound arrogant even condescending to the people that I currently surround me both at home and work but I have a need to surround myself with people who fire my imagination and my creativity as at the moment it feels like I am drowning in sea of greyness and indifference.
I am not saying the people around me are bad, or stupid but they have very little in common with me on many levels to a point I really do not make contact with them or can have a much needed conversations and discussions about a whole range of things.
Such conversations and discussions I have always found useful and very enlightening in so much they get me thinking, my imagination and creativity moving forward as I bounce ideas even extremely stupid ones. I did once have friends like that but I have moved far too many times in my recent life to put down real roots and keep in contact with people.
Though my depression has also meant I have slowly drifted away from people always thinking that no one ever wants to be a friend because of my intense, reflective and serious side, all of the things which spark my imagination and creativity within me.
But at the moment I cannot break the cycle of being among people who do not feed my imagination and creativity and find those who do. I am back to be far too self reliant and contained again because of my depression which means I am trapped inside myself screaming for those people who will feed my imagination and creativity.
As I said this sounds so arrogance but something I need to do soon just for my own sanity and peace of mind!
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