Once again I am on my anti-depressives again and after a month I am back to what everyone else would call normal in so much my moods have settled again and my outlook to life in general has returned back to a more positive one. Though I will still have downs even on the anti-depressants but they will last a fraction of the time if they occur.
So now I am getting used to my old self again though it does highlight just how incestuous depression can be in so much when I am off my anti-depressants it creeps back slowly and surely over the years to a point when it has full hold of me again to only be broken by the anti-depressants again.
But it also highlights something I have suspected in a long time that my depression has more of a physical component than a mental component though it may have had a mental trigger in the past as every time I stop my anti-depressants it returns as bad as before.
Though trying to get Doctors and those within the medical profession to take this seriously would be impossible as they always think they know everything regardless of the fact they don’t especially with mental illness. I think it is time I started to look into things myself over the next few years so I can go back to the Doctors with knowledge on my side.
But I have forgotten how good it felt to be normal again!
Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal journal of mine just follow the link to Acta Spiritu Amisso.