I Am Mr Nobody Sometimes!

Leave a comment

Just sometimes my depression robs me of my own identity and feeing of actually feeling like a human being to a point I am nobody. Though this not helped by the fact that people define me by what I do or where I come from rather than me myself.

This is done in an unthinking manor by people around me because our modern culture has gone backwards in so much the way of defining people by their age, profession and nationality especially within the media in general.

But this does have effect on people like myself who suffer depression in so much at the height of our depressions things like age, professions and nationality really have little meaning as the depression lock ourselves inside ourselves. This means such definitions are remote and unreal things to the suffer of depression so it further disconnects them from the world around them.

In the end it can make the person who has depression feel like a Mr Nobody and unimportant because such concepts are so remote from the core of themselves.

There is an irony to this as the person learns to live with their depression things like age, profession and nationality become unimportant again because as the person suffering depression comes out of it they gain a very firm idea of who they are and figure out it is more important to define themselves by themselves rather than unimportant things like age and the such!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CCCLXXXIII

Leave a comment

So far it has been a quiet weekend after a very busy but successful week at work where we not only did our target on the Tech Desk but smashed it so in the end a very satisfactory week all in all. Plus today I am also a bit more awake than yesterday as all I wanted to do was sleep though I should not of been surprised after last week.

Last week was also successful elsewhere outside of work in so much I managed to start to write down the first notes on a new Role-Playing background and more ideas for existing background something I have not done in a few weeks so feel good.

But as I have said before I am starting not to worry when my creativity seams to leave me every few while as it was starting to cause me to worry about it to a point it stopped it returning again. So my current tactics much as my sleep is not to worry about not being creative which seams to be working as I am slowly getting creative again.

So once again my mood has bounced back to a stable but good mood not worrying about things which I cannot do anything about and worrying about bad thing happening which may never happen.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Journal of a Lost Soul Part CCCLXXXII

Leave a comment

It is a strange at the moment as once again my mind is going through a quiet place again where it is full of ideas about world building of Role-Playing World, e.g. creative phase, rather than overly worrying about work even on my day off.

This still something I have to get used to but a very pleasant feeling both for myself and people around me. It also means that I am starting to enjoy my life even my job even if at times I am getting stressed and angry at work. But that is perfectly normal as I now do not hold on to the anger or stress currently.

I also know I will go through times when the stress, anger and depression but now I do not overly worry about such days and not even worry that they are going to occur. As my depression will always be a part of my life and what I need to learn is how to cope with it and ride such dark days.

Also at the moment because I have stopped worrying overly about being creative I have started to be creative but I am not pushing or punishing myself for not being creative so for period of times I will not be creative which will be less and less of a problem for me. Much like sleeping once I stopped worrying about not sleeping my sleep pattern came back naturally so I am using the same trick with my creativity which seams to be working so far.

I have to smile at the moment these journal entries still show my emotions and moods are still little extreme at times but starting to slowly level out finally!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Social Networks: Big is Not Always Beautiful!

Leave a comment

I think I have said this before about the fact that smaller and less centralised social networks are far more personal and on a human scale than the larger global social networks. But I thought I would repeat that as I am leaving Twitter finally after a weeks deliberation and thoughts of it real usefulness to my life in general.

One conclusion I have come to about the global social networks like Facebook, Twitter and the such is that big is not always beautiful or functional in the case of social networks.

At the start such social networks served a real useful function of bringing people together over the internet and served a real beneficial function of creating real communities on the internet. But as they have grown they have become far too big to a point now they cannot function as they did in the early days in so much they have become far too impersonal and difficult for one individual to comprehend the sheer scale of the social network itself.

In the end the size of these social networks has destroyed there usefulness as social networks as people in every day life really only deal with relatively few people on a daily basis and cannot really cope of copperhead the sheer number of people on such large social networks like Facebook or Twitter.

My personal view the future of social networks should not be the monoliths like Facebook or Twitter but more decentralized social networks which work on a far more smaller and manageable level so people can cope and comprehend what is going on the social networks in question.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Starting to Question Twitter’s Usefulness!

Leave a comment

I have started to question just how useful and usable Twitter is as both social web site and place to get news as now it is starting to become a place much like Facebook has become full of useless trivial remarks, useless information and worse of all becoming a place where people troll, bully and abuse other people. Add to this even with the people I follow or follow me can also be accused of spreading hate and most definitely distorted and uninformed propaganda to promote their causes almost at any cost.

What really got me thinking especially recently was the fact that Robin William’s daughter had to leave Twitter because of the abuse from trolls and basically unthinking, vindictive people who thought it was quite acceptable to throw abusive remarks and pictures at her.

I have been slowly backing away from Twitter in past few year or so to a point now I really only now use it to post links to my blog and much like Facebook before it, it has not generated that many hits on my blog other than it distorts the actual number of followers I have on my blog by including my Twitter users as my blog followers.

I must not only one who is starting to question the validity of the large social networks like Facebook and Twitter to be called social networks any more and I must not be only one to notice they have become places where people, companies and groups either out to sell their products, promote their political views even spread their messages of hate and intolerance.

Twitter much like Facebook before it is starting to fail as a social network much as did Facebook has done before it in so much it now not what you call a social network any more which promotes social interaction which makes it’s very existence in it’s present form very questionable indeed.

But unlike Facebook I will think long and hard about if I leave Twitter as it may be failing like Facebook but it is not as bad as Facebook yet!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

We Need More Idealists and Dreamers!

Leave a comment

Our modern world needs more idealists and dreamers to move forward as both my tilt at windmills or dream impossible dreams but each can bring change and new ideas from their views and dreams.

There is this modern view we should keep our feet on the ground and both idealists and dreamers waste their time but this from a stance of fear and ignorance of those who say it who have forgotten that it was idealists and dreamers who created the world around them!

If it were no for such people there would be no new ideas no change and the world, much as it is currently, will grind to a stop eventually die. They give society a spark of innovation, imagination even food for thought to move on to something new.

So the next time you put down an idealist or dreamer stop and remember it has been such people who got you were you are now!

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

The One Rule!

Leave a comment

Currently there is only one rule how I write and that is to write from the heart and spontaneously as ideas make themselves known in my own mind, especially the entries in this journal.

It sort of works for me but does mean sometimes the topics either jump around or worked to death on the journal but my mind has never been very focused if anything jumps from subject to subject in very quick succession.

But for me writing from the heart is working so for short time I will keep doing it.

Please Note: If you are interested in a more personal scrapbook of mine just follow the link to Patterns in the Static!.

Please Note: If you are interested in my home page just follow the link to Experiment No. 3.

Please Note: If you are interested in my small social network just follow the link to On the Other Side!.

Older Entries

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 205 other followers